DFCN - Feb 05

2-24-05

School, again. A little over a month and a half has passed since the winter break started and here I am starting my third semester studying Mandarin. Today I had my first class, new teachers, new classroom, new books and new classmates. My class consists of one guy from Vietnam , one girl from Thailand , like five Koreans and four Japanese. I am the only 'big nose' in the class (westerner that is). Still, a year after being here, I can still enjoy the fascinations from culture clashes I see everyday whether they take place in a classroom or on the street. They are really endless. Here's one of those daily occurrences: today, being the first class, we all had to introduce ourselves in front of the other people saying our names, country, time studying Chinese and hobbies. The Vietnamese kid starts simply telling us he has no hobbies in life whatsoever (by the way, all these things I write here, are not meant to be a pessimistic or derogative critique, they are only remarks and observations on happenings that make my brain turn around, in no way am I judging a specific culture as good or bad, simply denoting differences). Then comes a Japanese girl and she is asked the same question: "what do you like to do in life?". 'Above all, she says, I like to sleep. I watch TV, eat, but really, the one thing I want to do in life is sleep'. Then comes the 21-year-old Korean (south) and responds to the same question: 'My hobbies? he clarifies, my hobbies in life and money and women....oh yea, and like her (pointing at the previous Japanese girl), sleep.

I immediately had a reaction, not necessarily active, but I admit that in my head things started moving around. Why is it that we would never hear something like this from a student in Colombia, the States, France or Spain? The first person saying he had no hobbies in life, nothing to do other than watching TV would be undoubtedly regarded as laziness or lack of ambition. The other girl could be set up in a similar situation as her greatest aspiration is to sleep. Then the third person, all he wants is Money and Women. I'm not saying a lot of people don't think about these things. Heck, many people want to be able to earn decent money to make a good living and that's completely normal, so money is a priority after all for many. But when asked in such a direct fashion, who really admits to it? Aren't these things looked down upon in the West? Wouldn't they be judged as indolent, materialistic and sexist?

Here's one thing I've realized about most Asians. They have no shame whatsoever. Why is it that Karaoke is such a popular activity here? Many people on the other side of the world might be embarrassed of singing in front of other people and in such way admitting their horrible voice, if that is the case. Here, on the other hand, nothing will intimidate them. The will stand in front of thousands and dance in a Hawaiian dress while wearing a Mexican 'sombrero' if given the chance. The other night, I was at Lush, a small bar nearby where every Sunday they have an Open Mic session. Most of the bar is filled up with Westerners as it has turned into a small mecca for the homesick. People just come up with a song they have prepared and sing it to the rest to the rest on stage. That one time, a Japanese woman approached the microphone without any warning. She had a CD player in her pocket and a set of earphones plugged into her ears. She then started to sing 'acapella', to the music she was listening in her head. On the other side of the earphones stood a crowd of about 200 people in complete silence.

Not hard to imagine, her voice wasn't exactly Jewel-like. In the meantime Westerners grinned and watched with eyes wide open but not in complete disbelief. Anyone who has lived here for a while knows to expect these type of situations. At no point did people make fun of her, but it was amazing how after one song, and another, she kept on going and in the end performed four entire songs. She moved around the stage, jumped up and down while her thick black hair whipped side to side the way Slash does in a concert. Similarly, one could barely see her face.

As far as my opinion goes, I can tell you that I wouldn't do that. Because it's ridiculous and stupid? probably not. I simply wouldn't have the guts to do it unless I'm in the shower by myself. So how does she do this? This is a trait I have seen repeated on many Asians, and while I don't simply want to say "Asians have no shame" (otherwise people will say that I'm stereotyping), I do wish to clarify that they tend to be less inhibited than the other Western crowd I contrast to everyday.

2-18-05

Stupidity. After visiting Time Out's offices in Dashanzi and meeting the editors for which I've been doing work during the past two months, I met up with the other Colombians and went to Houhai for a walk around town. Houhai is a huge lake surrounded by fancy bars and restaurants and is also a good summer spot to walk around and just enjoy a nice day. During the winter the entire lake freezes and people skate on it at their own will and other 'skating devices' can be rented. One of them is a peculiar invention put pretty clever I must say. The grab a simple old-style classroom chair and put blades at the base of their legs. Provided with a couple of ski poles you're set to break the sound barrier as you push yourself across the ice. Never done it, but it certainly looked like a lot of fun. Another adaption made (and inevitably avoided) is the bicycle. I'm not so sure on the functionment of this archetype, but basically you just pedal your way around the ice using a minimum amount of friction between the tire and the ice. Looks like the Flintstones type of driving.

About a month ago in Houhai

Yesterday in Houhai. Not crowded for a reason.

As we walked by the lake, I saw a sing asking people (not really forbidding) to not walk on the ice beause it was getting thin. Well I guess it was because Pablo didn't understand characters that he decided to go straight in. That's him on the picture (left side). Well, stupid that we all are, we followed him and went for a walk, even started playing frisbee. Stupid? yes, and I paid the price. As we approached the edge and were ready to call it quits, I was the one doing the testing. Needless to say the ice is thinner on the edges and it is more probable for it to crack. Well guess what...CRACK! my left leg plunged into the icy water. Fortunately I was able to quickly get out of it and the incident didn't go any further. In about 30 seconds my pants were hard as rock and my foot wasn't doing great either. So let that be a lesson.

2-17-05

Reminiscing. Some of my friends just came to Beijing recently and I've been helping them out with all the aspects of moving into a new city/country implies: renting and apartment, registering for classes, buying phones, bicycles, food, beds, sheets, pillows etc! It's been interesting to go over this once again, only now I am the one leading the way. It's quite amazing to look back at last year when I had just gotten here and realize how lost I was.

In a place where close to no locals speak english, spanish or french, there was simply nothing I could do other than depend on other people to get settled down. I found some really nice people to help me along the way and well that's what I'm doing now with others. I know anyone would appreciate it. I remember when I first came to Beijing, I ate the same bread for about six days straight more than three times a day. I saw some people at school order it while saying "yi ge nan". So that's what I did, after standing there for a while and getting the right sounds, I repeated it like a tape recorder and WHAM! it worked! I was eating bread. The first days in China were tough and I think I can be honest with everyone reading this when I say that I cried the first night in my room. Here's how it happened.

I had left everything in the U.S., gotten on a plane full of Chinese people, and landed in a completely foreign place. At the airport all I had to get to my school was the already very used and frayed envelope in which I got the admission letter from BLCU. The address was written behind and that's what I showed to the cab driver who needless to say didn't speak a word of english. He tried to charge me 450 RMB but I only paid 150RMB. Little I knew, the real price is 70 RMB. So there I was, at the South Gate of my new school, at 11.30pm in a cold winter night with two huge bags, my backpack, and all the courage I could find in my heart.

The admission letter came with a map. The map, 99% in chinese characters, had one small part written in 'our characters' and read the following: "Foreign Students Dormitory Office". 'Gee' I think to myself, this can't be that hard. I'll follow the map, get to the office, assuming there was an english speaker since it was the foreign student dormitory office, pick up the key assigned to my name which was probably in a huge list and then be directed straight to my assigned dorm room. Well, I walk to that specific location and find two middle to old aged Chinese men laying back on a couple of chairs snoring at a TV with a glass bottle full of tea in their hands. Something in the back of my head told me that these guys didn't speak english but at that point anything could be possible. So I tapped on their window: helloo??? Anyone??- I say naively- My name is Daniel Montejo, I need a place for tonight. What came up next didn't even remotely sound like the 'Learn Chinese 10 minutes a Day' CD I had bought at the GMU bookstore a month before. It was more of a slap in the face telling me 'you IDIOT, what do you think this is, the Ritz Carlton??'. At least that's what it sounded like.

Things didn't work that way in China. One doesn't come and claim his/her room. It's a first come first serve system where everyone gets to pick their own dorm on the spot according to availability. But I didn't know that back then. So I walked out of that demonic room and dragged my bags outside where the night only got colder and colder. I wandered around for like a good half hour before a nice guy from India saw me almost at the point of getting on a cab back to the airport. He spoke to me in english and explained to me the ways of things around here. I nodded and followed him around to the different dorm buildings where I was to look for a room that I liked. Prices and sizes differed along with quality. I was first taken to the cheapest option but I quickly decided that it wasn't going to be the way I wanted to spend my semester. So I moved up to a more expensive alternative and found a decent room shared with a Japanese guy, Nobu.

I was physically drained and mentally confused. My hands and feet were cold. My back and my legs were hurting from carrying the luggage across campus several times. I hadn't really realized I was in China yet. There was not a single human being in a 10 thousand kilometer radius that I knew. After a short chat with Nobu and unpacking my stuff, I walked into the bathroom, locked myself in there for a few minutes and cried all my frustration away. I really don't know how to describe what I was feeling. I'm not sure whether I was really sad, nervous, anxious, scared to death or what. But none of that mattered, I just felt my heart had turned into one of those dry prunes they sell in cans. I hadn't cried in a long time I guess, and at that point it was all coming out. I dried my face with some toilet paper and in a macho way tried to hide from my roommate the fact that I cried my eyes out. He was coming from Japan after all, why would he be in such a state I thought.

Well that's all in the past and although 'painful' during a short period of time, well worthwhile as a life experience. I feel like I could go anywhere in the world now and be able to deal with it. Every day since then has been better than the one before. I'll just have to carve my future so that it happens to me again and again and again...

2-12-05

Need to get out of a date? A friend of mine was trying to get out of a date with a girl and jokingly says: 'hey Daniel, why don't u find me some good reasons to get out of a date'. So, as used to Google as I am, I found what are probably the 197 best ways to get out of a date if you ever find yourself in this position. Here's a copied version of it. I thought there were some funny ones.

1. I have to floss my cat.

2. I've dedicated my life to linguini.

3. I want to spend more time with my blender.

4. The President said he might drop in.

5. The man on television told me to say tuned.

6. I've been scheduled for a karma transplant.

7. I'm staying home to work on my cottage cheese sculpture.

8. It's my parakeet's bowling night.

9. It wouldn't be fair to the other Beautiful People.

10. I'm building a pig from a kit.

11. I did my own thing and now I've got to undo it.

12. I'm enrolled in aerobic scream therapy.

13. There's a disturbance in the Force.

14. I'm doing door-to-door collecting for static cling.

15. I have to go to the post office to see if I'm still wanted.

16. I'm teaching my ferret to yodel.

17. I have to check the freshness dates on my dairy products.

18. I'm going through cherry cheesecake withdrawal.

19. I'm planning to go downtown to try on gloves.

20. My crayons all melted together.

21. I'm trying to see how long I can go without saying yes.

22. I'm in training to be a household pest.

23. I'm getting my overalls overhauled.

24. My patent is pending.

25. I'm attending the opening of my garage door.

26. I'm sandblasting my oven.

27. I'm worried about my vertical hold.

28. I'm going down to the bakery to watch the buns rise.

29. I'm being deported.

30. The grunion are running.

31. I'll be looking for a parking space.

32. My Millard Filmore Fan Club meets then.

33. The monsters haven't turned blue yet, and I have to eat more dots.

34. I'm taking punk totem pole carving.

35. I have to fluff my shower cap.

36. I'm converting my calendar watch from Julian to Gregorian.

37. I've come down with a really horrible case of something or other.

38. I made an appointment with a cuticle specialist.

39. My plot to take over the world is thickening.

40. I have to fulfill my potential.

41. I don't want to leave my comfort zone.

42. It's too close to the turn of the century.

43. I have some real hard words to look up in the dictionary.

44. My subconscious says no.

45. I'm giving nuisance lessons at a convenience store.

46. I left my body in my other clothes.

47. The last time I went out, I never came back.

48. I've got a Friends of Rutabaga meeting.

49. I have to answer all of my "occupant" letters.

50. None of my socks match.

51. I have to be on the next train to Bermuda.

52. I'm having all my plants neutered.

53. People are blaming me for the Spanish-American War.

54. I changed the lock on my door and now I can't get out.

55. I'm making a home movie called "The Thing That Grew in My Refrigerator."

56. I'm attending a perfume convention as guest sniffer.

57. My yucca plant is feeling yucky.

58. I'm touring China with a wok band.

59. My chocolate-appreciation class meets that night.

60. I never go out on days that end in "Y."

61. My mother would never let me hear the end of it.

62. I'm running off to Yugoslavia with a foreign-exchange student named Basil Metabolism.

63. I just picked up a book called "Glue in Many Lands" and I can't put it down.

64. I'm too old/young for that stuff.

65. I have to ash/condition/perm/curl/tease my hair.

66. I have too much guilt.

67. There are important world issues that need worrying about.

68. I have to draw "Cubby" for an art scholarship.

69. I'm uncomfortable when I'm alone or with others.

70. I promised to help a friend fold road maps.

71. I feel a song coming on.

72. I'm trying to be less popular.

73. My bathroom tiles need grouting.

74. I have to bleach my hare.

75. I'm waiting to see if I'm already a winner.

76. I'm writing a love letter to Richard Simmons.

77. You know how we psychos are.

78. My favorite commercial is on TV.

79. I have to study for a blood test.

80. I'm going to be old someday.

81. I've been traded to Cincinnati.

82. I'm observing National Apathy Week.

83. I have to rotate my crops.

84. My uncle escaped again.

85. I'm up to my elbows in waxy buildup.

86. I have to knit some dust bunnies for a charity bazaar.

87. I'm having my baby shoes bronzed.

88. I have to go to court for kitty littering.

89. I'm going to count the bristles in my toothbrush.

90. I have to thaw some karate chops for dinner.

91. Having fun gives me prickly heat.

92. I'm going to the Missing Persons Bureau to see if anyone is looking for me.

93. I have to jog my memory.

94. My palm reader advised against it.

95. My Dress For Obscurity class meets then.

96. I have to stay home and see if I snore.

97. I prefer to remain an enigma.

98. I think you want the OTHER [your name].

99. I have to sit up with a sick ant.

100. I'm trying to cut down.

101. My asthma is acting up again

102. That would interfere with my time to wait for the government to take me away.

103. You're ugly, I'm busy, have a nice day

104. Its my goldfish's birthday

105. Uh, I have stuff to do.

106. I have to make an air sandwich

107. I have to hide the bodies.

108. I don't have time to go on a date...with YOU!

109. I have to wash my hair.

110. I have to clean my toilet

111. I need to spend quality time with my weed wacker

112. I need to clean the air in my room

113. My hamster is having a heart transplant and I need to stay for moral support.

114. I caught a rare deadly African disease that's highly contagious.

115. My gerbil is getting married.

116. I have plans to clean the cracks in my floor

117. Sorry, when you came to my door I mistook you for a mormon and took cover.

118. I had to rob your house

119. That's the night I reorganize my rock collection.

120. Pinnochio is on tonight

121. I have to try out for the ice skating team at school.

122. I don't date outside my species

123. Sorry I think I'm gay

124. I have to go...........over..............there.

125. My butt is to big in this dress

126. I have to take out the trash

127. My dog had baby kittens.

128. I can't, I need to take my computer apart and put it back together.

129. I have to go shopping for my mother.

130. I'm sorry, I have to rotate the strings on all of my shoes.

131. No

132. I told my car I would tenderly rub wax into it's body

133. I have to go for my full body wax appointment

134. I can't I was asked to go to another party w/o you

135. I don't date goats!

136. Ally Mcbeal is on

137. I'm reading with my widower

138. I have to brush my teeth.

139. Alf comes on soon

140. I'm sick.

141. I've had a better offer, some bloke is coming round to set fire to my head

142. I'm busy cleaning the blood off my axe

143. My dad said I can't date till I am married

144. I'm shaving my dog.

145. It's against my religion to date people named (insert relevant name)

146. My grandma is on fire.

147. I'm getting married tonight.

148. I'm engaged.

149. I don't want to ruin our friendship.

150. I have family in town.

151. I just washed my hair.

152. It's that time of the month again.

153. My father's grandmother's aunt's mother died.

154. I have to take down the Christmas lights.

155. I have to go to a surprise party for my grandma's birthday.

156. I left my tolerance in another coat.

157. I just got back together with my ex

158. I don't like people.

159. I have to alphabetize my CDs. (Hey, is that supposed to be insulting to me? -- dan)

160. I might see someone who knows me.

161. My brother's sister's mum's son's dad died.

162. I would, but it would be a complete waste of make-up.

163. My pet snake is constipated again.

164. I have a phobia of people named (insert name here).

165. I have to teach my pig to sing.

166. I just got sick (right after you asked me out).

167. My dog is too tired.

168. I never said I'd go out with you, that was my evil twin.

169. I would go out with you but my waiting list is full.

170. There's a four hour TV special on trimming shrubbery.

171. I'm washing the sofa.

172. I have to milk my cow.

173. Everquest.

174. I don't want to miss Martha Stewart's premiere.

175. I have to teach my frog how to croak.

176. I'm too busy watching the paint dry.

177. The "Rocky" marathon is on that night.

178. I promised my mum I'd bathe the hamster.

179. I tripped over an ant and broke my leg.

180. I need to clip my nose hairs.

181. I have to read the labels on all of my food.

182. You are extremely unattractive. Sorry, someone had to tell you.

183. I'm gay.

184. I don't like you.

185. My goat broke a horn.

186. I have to go to the dentist.

187. I have to brush my dog's teeth.

188. I must go in search of my charms which were stolen by an angry leprechaun.

189. I'm going to the moon.

190. My water wings are flat.

191. I have to stay home and give my goldfish a bath.

192. I'm going to be playing with my mental blocks.

193. I have to wax the driveway.

194. I'm not into dating right now.

195. I'm teaching my goldfish how to play the electric guitar.

196. I'm teaching my dog to meow.

197. I have to watch Oprah.

2-08/09-05

Doing some paragliding and celebrating the New Year. My trip to Washington DC turned out to be more productive than I thought so since I figured out a way of graduating this summer instead of next year as I had initially planned. The day after coming back, my cousin Pablo and I went with Alex (our Swiss world champion instructor) to the flying site. Once again we practiced take-offs but still no flying, the wind was coming from the wrong side.

The day after, Feb. 8, (notice the correct use of AP style) Andres and Lishengjuan (a Korean female girl friend of ours) joined us in what was a different idea for spending the Chinese New Year and a day of flying instruction. Since fireworks are forbidden in Beijing and the city is almost completely deserted, we decided to go out to the countryside and celebrate the New Year with people from a small village I honestly don't know the name of. However if you want to read more about that story and see some pictures you can click here.

Me (photo: Pablo Atuesta.)

My first flight (photo: Pablo Atuesta.)

Focusing more on the paragliding side of the two day trip, this is how it went. Alex took us to a small hill where beginners learn how to glide for about 30-40 seconds. It's a way to get a feeling of a takeoff, controlling the glider in the air, and landing. I flew a total of about 6-7 times that day, all short flights but it was a lot of fun I must say since last time I flew a glider with my father was about 10 years ago.

The first takeoff and landing actually went really smoothly. As the day progressed we had less and less wind which made the takeoffs somewhat more challenging since one has to run more to compensate for the lack of airspeed. My cousin Pablo (who just got his Chinese name 保罗 Baoluo) made his first flight as well. At the bottom of the hill Andres kept running around trying to get a first feel of the glider. We spent the morning and afternoon doing this until at around 4pm, completely exhausted, we decided to start planning our New Year's celebration.

After my first flight (photo: pablo or andres)

Pablo doing takeoffs

Andres in action

Alex, our instructor, has a blast watching us fall all over the place

2-04-05

Leaving tomorrow. Well this is it for now, I'm going back home. After running many errands and realizing I am going to graduate this summer instead of two years from now, I return to Beijing with a decent workload on my back. I will be taking three classes through Mason from China, Mandarin classes still in Tsinghua University, then doing some work in Beijing and work with a DC newspaper called the DC Asian Times. That should keep me busy for a while.

If you are a frequent visitor of my web site you may have noticed little changes here and there. I am taking an 'Online Journalism' class which is basically about making a web site and learning how to write for an online audience. Hopefully by May I'll be a lot better at this. As a consequence, you will now see at least two updates per week since that is the requirement for the class. Alright, that's about it, back to packing my shipment of deodorants since they are impossible to find in China. I need to pack up for six months at least!